


The Silent and the Moody

by IdeaHunter



Category: RWBY
Genre: Fall of Beacon (RWBY), Graphic Depictions of Illness, Grief/Mourning, Mental Health Issues, Original Character(s), Other, Sad, Trauma, slight gore
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2020-12-13 18:07:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21001922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IdeaHunter/pseuds/IdeaHunter
Summary: The night Beacon fell all of Vale lost something, be it a friend, a lover, a brother or a teacher. But there's a girl that, more than anyone, felt a hole in her heart: that's the night Neopolitan lost forever Roman Torchwick.She's now lost, without a place to go or a goal to keep her moving forward; could a stranger met while leaving Beacon hold the keys to her future...and her past?(Tags will be added as the story goes on)





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> Necessary note: this is my first fanfic EVER and English isn't my first language; keep that in mind before reading this. If you want to share some advice you're welcome, just be nice.

The leaden night was still saturated with the smell of smoke, blood, iron and the cries of people who were desperately trying to save themselves from the fury of the Grimms, the Elysian Guards and the White Fang. In the woods that surrounded the Beacon academy, a girl lying on the grass, holding an umbrella, slowly regained her senses, massaging her aching neck. Her white dress was soiled with dirt and dew-laden grass, her face scratched all over and her hair a bush bristling with knots, branches and leaves. 

As she sat up, trying to rearrange her thoughts, she raised her head and saw a large column of smoke rising from the nearby city, with several flying armored ships surrounding it. Everything that had happened up to that point came back to mind like a river after a flood: the tournament, the accidents, the attack ... Beacon finally fell. But the girl's thoughts were turned elsewhere, they went to a man lost of sight during a fight with a little girl ... a well-behaved criminal, dressed elegantly, with red hair and the habit of smoking. The girl immediately stood up, meeting the pain of a sprained ankle, but her priority was not her well-being: she began to limp towards the city as quickly as she could, helping herself with her umbrella and imploring every god in her mind she had ever believed in (noone, in truth, but prayed anyway) that the man in his thoughts was fine. She entered the city, now destroyed and still in flames, dodging rubble, White Fang henchmen and Grimm of all sorts while looking for a sign, anyone of his man. But all that his eyes perceived were destroyed buildings, raging fires, wandering monsters that began to point her in a very worrying way. She continued to wander for hours, without peace, without respite, without anyone who could even understand her, let alone help her; and meanwhile her anxiety grew in her heart making it heavier than the many boulders which now represent the remains of an oasis of light in a dark and cold world. 

Soon, however, the anxiety disappeared to make way for something much worse: on the ground, scattered over the rubble as if they had fallen from a great height, the girl saw a black bowler hat, decorated with a red line and a purple feather, along with a half-burned cigar. She felt the ground fail from under her feet as she looked at the two objects in a trance, falling to her knees. Both of her eyes became pale mother-of-pearl, while warm and large tears began to fall copiously down her now colorless cheeks.

That night a soundless scream filled the air


	2. What now?

The girl left behind the ruins of that smoking city with her mentor's hat on her head, his cigar in her pocket, limping full of doubts and fears in the dark forest; now the whole world seemed to be only the scenario of a black and white painting, each person a spring-loaded mannequin that moves without thinking where it goes, each face a white mask of cold and expressionless chalk. All of creation, to her, suddently looked like... fake. Put there just to take up space. Only aesthetic. At last her legs gave up to the feet of a large tree that towered over the surrounding forest: Beacon was far away now, and all that she heard was the furious roar of the wind and the calls of the beasts of the night. Trying to catch her breath and hold back the tears running down her cheeks, the girl sat with her back against the trunk of the colossal tree: her eyelids began to grow heavy, her conscience began to slip into the darkness of oblivion, in front of her eyes began to reveal fantastic and terrible shapes and in the end, tired, unmotivated and with the feeling of a canyon opening up inside her, she slipped into a deep sleep.

_-Hey Neo-Roman took his mind off his desk a minute and looked at his short companion, sitting on a dust box while checking the stolen goods from a Schnee train, raising her head towards him as a sign of attention. -You know, I was wondering ... do you remember the time I found you in the middle of those rubble? - The girl nodded vigorously with a wide smile on her face - You were a little girl given up for adoption by a family of bankers who, just by chance, didn't really want to let us carry out our "withdrawal" degenerating the discussion into a little... quarrel, to say so. I was wondering ... - The girl's eye colors changed in a blink of an eye, exchanging pink and brown between them as she tilted her head in a puzzled way. - ... did you ever hated me? I mean, I blew up your family and probably your house ... every other person would have sworn revenge, chased me everywhere, tried to kill me, yadda yadda... but you decided to work for me. For the person who ruined your life. Unusual, don't you think? -. _ _She got up from the crate and walked to the desk, picked up a pen and a sheet lying around there and began to write: **I've never been angry at you. I didn't like those bankers**. Roman raised his eyelashes: - Really! And tell me, how come? - She resumed writing **Too presumptuous. They thought that being rich would make me happy. They hadn't understood a thing about me. They never tried**. Roman looked at her with obvious interest: - This intrigues me. Do you think I understood everything about you? - The girl wrote on the sheet that she then showed with a big smile** At least you try. And you make me feel useful for something, like saving your ass with every escape!**-Hey! I'm not so bad! - The girl, in response, rolled her eyes towards the sky and looked back at the man who responded with vivacity to the provocation. And he smiled, because he knew that this was the only place he would ever really feel at home_

The daylight and the heat of the sun woke the girl back to reality. The fact that it was still on one piece was surprising, considering the very high density of grimm present in the area; helping herself with the umbrella, she stood up again, noting that her ankle pain had subsided enough to leave her at least walking at a normal pace. Even her aura was starting to recover, although she couldn't be really considered combat ready; so she continued walking always with her back to the column of smoke left by what remained of Beacon. In truth she didn't even know where she was really going, she just knew she wanted to get as far away as possible from that damn place. But what he would do next was unknown. She had just barely managed to run away in tears, let alone if she was in a position to make plans for the future! To tell the truth, by now, the same word "future" seemed to her to be the hardcover of some pitiful show for children. The identical trees of that forest certainly did not help either the orientation or the oppressive sense of uselessness that gripped her; she found herself, after what seemed like hours, in front of a gravel path, probably one of the many that led to the academy. He took it hoping to get somewhere, even if it was just an abandoned cabin, it didn't matter; indeed, the prospect of living in complete isolation, far from everything and everyone did not mind that much. She no longer had any place to go, no one to ask for help, the authorities looked for her as a criminal and probably the command of Roman's gang was passed to Cinder, assuming it hadn't broken up. Perhaps the hermit's life was the best choice; but doing so would cement the sense of powerlessness that oppressed her.

In the anger of these thoughts she kicked a tree, which resulted in further pain in the foot: she wanted to let off all of the steam, she wanted to scream, she wanted desperately to hit something that made her feel powerful, able, useful again. The panting, dirty, sweaty girl wiped her eyes reddened by crying and cold and for a while she stood still, undecided on what to do: too many questions gripped her mind, too many doubts clouded her judgment, too much anger blinded her in front the road to take to move forward. In the end, however, she decided to follow the path that took her away from Beacon, hoping to end up in a village outside the kingdoms that could give her at least some food. She sadly stroked the hat she was wearing on her head, wondering if she could ever overcome the loss of the only person who gave meaning to her existence and to build a life with her own strength.

After a few minutes of walking she caught sight of a figure standing in the middle of the path in the distance. The girl slowed her pace to try to analyze the individual, but only saw that he was dressed in azure and wore a red scarf. He stood there still, as if guarding something ... or waiting for someone. Despite the fear that he might be a bandit, the girl continued to advance, getting closer and closer to the figure ... until this one, probably alerted by the sound of footsteps on the gravel, turned and looked straight at her, showing her a pink eye and a brown one.


	3. Safe house, familiar host

For an instant the world froze. All Remnant froze in that one moment as Neo stared into the so familiar eyes of the stranger. sHe looked at him with astonishment; from the pocket on his chest a white handkerchief spilled out, which she mechanically rearranged as if she were dreaming. The stranger approached Neo who remained still, without understanding who the man was or why he had his same peculiar eye colors. He stopped when he was less than a meter from the girl; and only after what seemed like an eternity he opened his mouth and spoke to Neo: «What...is your name?» the girl put her hand to her mouth uncertainly and shook her head slowly, trying to make it clear that she wasn't able to speak. He tilted his head a little: «Oh ... are you mute?» She nodded softly and he imitated her, looking at the void and muttering: «Yes...yes, understood...» but he recovered and looked at her again: «You were...running away from Beacon, right? If you don't know where to go I can accommodate you in my house» Neo looked at him without knowing what to do: in any other situation he would have refused and would have left forgetting the thing ... but she had nothing left. And she really wanted to know who he was; so she nodded, starting to show confidence. He adjusted his scarf around his neck: «Well...well, follow me then» And he walked along the path with Neo following him, treading Roman's hat on his head.

After a few minutes of walking they came out of the woods entering a vast grass plain where, in the distance, they could see the profile of some houses, even though not all of them seemed in good condition; the midday sun illuminated the whole scene while the two continued to walk along the path, lost in their thoughts. The landscape that surrounded her filled Neo's soul with a serenity she had experienced a few times before, and for a few minutes she forgot about all that had happened, about the fall of Beacon, of Roman, of the boy ... it was her alone in the vastness of the green to enjoy the warmth of the sun after a cold night and to feel the coolness of the wind ruffle her hair while holding her hat to not let it fly away. They walked until sundown and, although they approached the city, it was clear that they would not arrive before the next day, so the boy went to the lawn beside the road to prepare a place to sleep and eat. When night fell the two began to eat some rations made warm on the spot, and Neo took the opportunity to study his "companion" better: the blue shirt did not bear any symbol or logo but was embroidered with emerald lines and buttons; the bright red scarf was held very well, but it could be seen from the grazes to the garments that it must have been by now quite old; pants and shoes showed nothing out of the ordinary, except for the chain of a watch that came out of the pocket; the thing that most attracted the attention of Neo, however, were the worn and wrinkled black leather gloves, as if its owner had never taken them off. His clothing, on the whole, was very similar to Torchwick's even though he seemed more worn out, as if the owner had an emotional connection with those clothes (and Neo knew for sure that Roman would throw away a jacket to take another just if that would've lost a button). The boy noticed the inquisitive gaze of the other and so he asked her: «Is there something wrong?» She recovered and shook her head energetically, slightly embarrassed at having been caught peeping; he tilted his head a little: «So...what's your name?» The girl looked at him, put the saucepan down on the floor and tried to mimic the letters of her name, but the confused look of the other showed that the thing wasn't working. She puffed out her cheeks and took some blades of grass, and then put them to form her name on the barren land near the bonfire; the boy read in the uncertain light of the fire: «Your name is ... Neo?» The girl nodded, then pointed to the boy: «Mh? My name?» She nodded a second time and the boy finished the food in the saucepan before answering: «My name is Gin» In Neo's head seemed to ring a distant bell hearing that name; she didn't remember where she had heard it, but it inspired her with a sense of disquieting familiarity accentuated by the same eyes as her. She looked at him, continuing to eat, less and less convinced of the reliability of that man, while he stretched out to look at the sky; the sounds of the night did not seem to distract him from the deep thoughts in which he was immersed, while the stars and the shattered moon evoked unkonown memories. Neo looked around hoping not to see Grimm wandering around the area, though it was quite likely.

The boy turned to her: «Sorry ... Neo, right?» The girl turned to look at him, her eyes opal-colored; he looked at her without any evident emotion: «Once we get to town ... will you have someone to call? Someone to pick you up?» She lowered her head a little, then shook it sadly. He gave a light sigh: «Oh ... I'm sorry. Do you live alone?» Neo looked at him: the boy's expression didn't seem to have changed, but his voice betrayed a clear curiosity, like a child's. She shook her head again, and the boy stood up a little: «Are you ... a wanderer?» His tone seemed more and more curious but his expression was unchanged. The girl was increasingly confused about the nature of her companion: she seemed to really want to help her but his expressions were cold and inscrutable, impossible to decipher his true intentions. So she nodded slowly, trying not to let too much of her thoughts leak out. Gin sat up: «Is there ... something that haunts you? Not to do the nosy, of course» Neo looked at him trying not to be surprised: had he understood it from the uncertainty of her gestures? Or from the way she looked at the horizon? How did he sensed her state of mind despite her efforts to remain calm? And above all ... why did she felt an affinity with that boy? Him, probably guessing her doubts, quickly backed down: «Oh sorry ... I probably shouldn't have asked. If you don't want to ... er ... answer, it doesn't matter» she kept staring at him, her eyes now of their natural color, looking at him from the bluish hair to the tip of his shoes; then she began to make some gestures in the air trying to say something. He looked at her hands as if they were two butterflies and then returned to look at her: «Do you...want to know what I was doing in the forest around Beacon?» She nodded, surprised that he could figure out what those gestures meant. Gin turned his gaze to the academy: «I...can't tell you for sure. It's something I often do, wander around in the forest without a purpose...just because I like it. The fact that he found you was...a lucky event» Neo noticed, however, that during the pauses of his speeches he continued to murmur almost imperceptibly and that his normally docile and calm eyes sometimes lit in a fierce light . The boy went back to lie on the grass: «I ... I think I will go to sleep now. If...if you want to stay awake, that's fine. But...please...when you fall asleep remember to put out the fire, okay?» With that he closed his eyes and went to sleep. She looked at him for a while, before following his advice and putting out the fire, lying down and closing her eyes under the starry sky

_«Hey, Neo» Roman turned to his companion without taking his eyes off the newspaper he was reading, sitting in an armchair in their hotel room. The girl was distracted by her scroll and watched him read with interest: «We're famous! Listen: The criminal we now know to be Roman Torchwick has carried out another large-scale robbery and, once again, the police failed to get his hands on him. We suspect the presence of an accomplice who helps him with every escape, but nothing has been confirmed yet.» He put away the newspaper and took a long drag from the cigar in his mouth: «I must say, however, that the police forces are disappointing. For months now I have escaped them and only now they thought that I could have an accomplice?» Neo gave a silent chuckle to which Roman replied with a grin: «Eh, I know, better than a comedy. But at least now we have some recognition; I mean, we work so hard to make those robberies, it was time for people to start appreciate it.» Neo started typing on the scroll screen which she then showed Roman: «**Doesn't this mean that now the police will be on us even more?** » «Well, better this way. We will have an extra incentive to work» _ _The criminal shook the ashes from his cigar and looked at the girl: «I wouldn't mind, to tell the truth, to continue like this forever. To rob left and right, to become two criminal celebrities, to have our name written on all the history books as the greatest evildoers of our time ... better than being actors or politicians, if you ask me» Neo smiled and layed down on the sofa, watching the ceiling blur as his body grew heavier. The last thing he heard was Roman's laugh: «Heh, I figured you'd fall down. Well, good night then» _

Neo woke up with the morning sun just above the horizon that tinged the sky with a very light blue, starting to illuminate the plain and all that was on it. Gin was still asleep, so she sat and watched the sun rise and define the colors of the day; the sky became a more and more intense blue, interrupted by some white spots in correspondence of the clouds, the animals of the nearby forest began to woke up and so also the Grimm made their growls heard. It was probably one of these that woke Gin up, who sat up yawning and looking at the girl: "Good morning. Were there any problems tonight?” She shook her head and began to put away the various dishes from the night before. After less than twenty minutes the two were again on their way to the village, which now began to show itself as half destroyed, probably by the grimm during the Fall. There were not many signs of human presence and every house, for as whole as it was, always showed signs of battle. Neo looked at the place almost with a sad eye, aware that she was partly responsible for what had happened; however with all the crimes committed over the years with Roman, her mind was accustomed to scenes of destruction and it took much more to upset her. Gin headed for a house apparently better than the others, despite the broken glass, some missing tiles and the scratch marks scattered a bit everywhere; he opened the door without much difficulty and let Neo enter first. The interior was kept with surprising care: the floor was clean, the paintings depicting landscapes were in order, there was even electric light, running water and gas for cooking food. Gin showed her all the rooms in the house calmly, taking the guests' room last: «For the moment you will sleep here. The bathroom is at your disposal and there are clean clothes in the closet. If...if there are any problems call me». She nodded and sat down on the bed letting out a sigh of relief: after all that walking the sight of a bed was a kind of a gift from heaven. The boy had already left so Neo undressed completely, went to the bathroom trying not to be noticed and got under the hot water jet of the shower, enjoying the sensation of the water passing over his body and feeling the whole fatigue and the accumulated tension in the muscles melt into a pleasant numbness. She carefully washed her hair and body, beginning to distinguish scratches and bruises left by the landing in the woods from the dirt accumulated by the ash of the flames and from the earth; no sign was serious in itself, but she began to feel the annoyance of all the little bruises on her thighs, on her hips and on his shoulders. She came out of the shower after half an hour (of which twenty minutes were spent just washing and fixing her hair), she wrapped himself in the towel to cover at least the sensitive parts and started to dry her hair; after ten minutes Gin knocked on the bathroom door: «Are you ... are you still in there? I have clean clothes with me, if you let me in just a min-» In less than five seconds Neo had time to open the door, take the clothes, kick the guy right in the face just to make sure he wouldn't peep and close the door. Gin layed in the middle of the corridor, stunned and aching: «That...that also works, I guess»

The two had lunch with a stew that Neo greatly appreciated, especially given the fasting of the days before, to then discuss what had happened to the village. «Two days ago the Grimm attacked this village, attracted by the dismay of...well...I don't think I need to tell you...killing almost everyone and putting the rest on the run...except me.» Neo looked at him with curiousity, so he went on: «This house isn't ... technically mine, I just put it in a little place when the Grimms left to go to Beacon. Fortunately it didn't suffer much damage, but I had to work almost the entire night. The next day I decided to go for a walk in the woods...and I found you» She didn't seem too convinced about the story, but she passed over it and just nodded. Gin looked at her with the same expression of the night before: «I think I can accommodate you for a few more days. Have you...already decided where you want to go?» The girl looked down; she hadn't thought about it that much during the journey, and there were still many doubts left, but at least that boy had given her a new goal in the short term: understand where she had met that boy before, and why he seemed so familiar. So she took a piece of paper and a pencil from the table and wrote: «**I think I'll stay here for a while longer.**» Gin looked at the piece of paper and nodded: «Understood...but you'll have to help me with the housework, at least. Alright?» Neo's face clearly showed her lack of enthusiasm with the cheecks puffed, to which Gin replied with a chuckle: «It wouldn't be fair if you stayed here doing nothing...right?» The girl rolled her eyes and nodded as the other stood up: «Okay...then you could start by clearing the table...while I wash the dishes?» Neo got up sighing and started to settle, while evening fell outside on the quiet ruins of the village.


	4. Curiosity

The morning sky covered the whole plain in blue with white dots, telling each creature, living or not, that it was time to start another day. In the half-destroyed remains of a village, a girl wandered with a lost look holding a pink umbrella in her hand, the white jacket covering a black turtleneck, the long pink skirt, decorated with brown arabesques, swayed lightly with every step. The girl watched the rubble of the houses and the signs of struggle left on the ground, raising her eyes from time to time to admire the clouds above her, so white and fluffy. Looking down slowly, she looked the green meadows stretch out to the horizon, then stop to stare at the forest and the remains of the Beacon Tower.

It's been a week now since the fall and, although the fires and the fights were long over, Neo couldn't help but feel sorrow at the sight of his mentor's grave. Every time she went out for a breath of fresh air her gaze always followed the same route: ruins-sky-horizon-Beacon. Always the same, always towards the former academy. After getting used to the routine in the company of Gin, the girl began to ask questions that were not easy to answer: would she find a place to go? Did she wanted to stay in that house all her life? Would there ever be a way to integrate into society? What would she do from now on? "The short-term goal", as she had defined it, was just a way to convince herself that it was right to stay in that house; but even though the curiosity about the owner of the aforementioned was still strong, it had passed into the background once Neo was emotionally stabilized (despite calling her stable was a big word). All the melancholy, the sense of bewilderment, of helplessness, of uselessness that she had managed to put aside for a week now returned stronger than ever, a worm that dug into her, slowly opening a hole in her soul. The air entered and came out of her mouth slightly stronger than normal, a faint sigh that showed a perfect image of Neo's feelings.

A voice brought the girl back to reality: «Neo!» She turned to see the boy who was hosting her peep out from behind a pile of rubble wearing her usual blue jacket along with a pair of black trousers and the ever-present gloves. This reached her with slow and long steps: «I imagined I would've found you here...always looking at Beacon?» She merely lowered her eyes a little and turned back to the forest. Gin looked at the girl apprehensively: «You were...thinking again of your mentor...right?» Neo sighed a second time: there were times when she regretted naming him, and mentioning his death during the Fall, and this was one of those times. Gin put his hands in his pockets: «It's not good for you...mulling over your doubts. At this rate...you will let them get the better of you...ending up leading you to stagnation»The girl threw her eye behind herself, giving the boy a look that clearly said "**And what do you know?"** He sighed, sitting on a huge piece of debris next to the girl: «You are always unbelievable...when it comes to expressing yourself without speaking, you know?» Then, looking at the tower, he continued: «I know very well how are you feeling. Wanting...to take action desperately, but...feeling paralyzed by the fear of failure. The fear of taking the wrong path. The fear of...lose yourself. I've spent most of my life...feeling afraid. Wandering from kingdom to kingdom...lowering the head as soon as someone met my gaze...hiding in the dark crevices of forgotten warehouses. Eventually...I got used to it; I said to myself: "If I'm so sick in big cities...I might as well go away for good" and now...I'm here. Far from the realms...from other humans...from the real life.» Neo listened to him with his eyes down, immersed in her thoughts: «You were lucky...to have someone to refer to. But ask yourself...is it respectful to him to block yourself like that?» The girl took that question like a punch in the stomach; she raised her gaze and stopped it on the boy who was looking at her apprehensively, then lowered it again with a lost expression. He sighed and stood up: «Is it almost lunchtime...are you coming?» The girl looked at the forest one last time, stroking a strand of hair behind her ear; then she turned her back on it and walked away with the boy.

That week had given Neo the chance to get used to a daily routine that, despite giving her a lot of free time, needed precise tasks always performed at a certain time: as soon as they get up in the morning they put in order the room in which they had slept for then prepare and eat breakfast; lunch was always between noon and 1 pm and in this time it was also necessary to clean the kitchen and dining room; in the middle of the afternoon a few rounds had to be done to check that there were no Grimm or bandits nearby and, if so, to eliminate them; while one did this, the other treated the vegetable garden behind the house from which much of what they could eat came from; dinner was served between seven and eight in the evening, much like lunch. They had arranged to take showers twice a week so as not to bother each other, and once a week they did laundry. In short, it was nothing too demanding, and Neo used her free time to walk among the rubble (which often facilitated the patrol), to browse among the shelves full of books in the house or to listen to music from the scroll. The house had a TV, but the communication network wasn't great so they kept it on mainly during meals just for the news.

After lunch, Gin went to his bedroom to take a nap while Neo began to wander around the house in search of something that could keep her mind occupied; after failing to find a book that caught her attention, she sat down on the sofa and began to seriously consider the idea of going to sleep too, when her gaze fell on an object that peeked out from behind the door; looking better she saw that it was a huge pair of very colorful but bizarrely constructed scissors, so much so that the girl had to pick them up and open them to get a precise idea of their shape: a blade was straight and had several sharp points that the it made it look like a Grimm's jaw, the other was curved like a trail of smoke, and was decorated with various spiral motifs. Overall, the scissors must've been a very dangerous weapon if used by expert hands but the two blades were so different from one another that they could very well have been two separated weapons. Neo imagined that Gin was using them in combat, which she couldn't know for sure, since that week the patrol shifts were all for her, and she tried to imagine the boy fighting against a Grimm using that weapon but nothing came to her mind (although it must be said that it is not easy to imagine the girl using Hush effectively without having seen her before, too).

She was lost in these thoughts when Gin's voice startled her: «That thing in your hand...is it my weapon?» Well, at least he had confirmed one of Neo's suspicions, but his voice wasn't very enthusiastic: «You could at least have asked for permission...you know?» She began to gesticulate trying to justify herself, but the boy interrupted her: «Forget it, it's all right ... but the next time you want to take Pelican's Beak in hand...please, just tell me. I...I am very fond of it and I would hate it if something were to happen to it.» The girl made a puzzled face hearing the name of the weapon...at least until she notice that actually, once closed, the shape of the scissors was very reminiscent of that characteristic beak of pelicans. Gin guessed what the other was thinking and sighed: «Yes...it's called that because of its shape. I have...never been a champion of inventiveness» then he put the weapon back in place and headed for the kitchen:«Do you...do you want some coffee? ». The girl followed him, attracted by the prospect of a hot coffee, completely forgetting to ask him about the symbol engraved on the handle of the scissors: two faces in profile, one cheerful and one angry, which looks in opposite directions but are held together by a crown.

The fact of not having asked about the symbol was really bothering Neo, who had stayed at home while Gin was on patrol (apparently the shifts were weekly, so the boy would be on patrol the following week). The garden did not seemed to be in need of special care, so the girl took the opportunity to wander around the house to satisfy her growing curiosity: the eyes, the name, the way of speaking, the symbol, the gloves...there were too many strange things too different, and she needed something that could help her put everything together in a plausible way. After searching among the shelves in the dining room and in the living room, without being particularly successful, she decided to check in the boy's bedroom confiding that she would surely find something there. Once in front of the door she felt a little hesitant: she had never entered that room before (honestly neither of the two ever entered the other's room), and she feared what she could've found...but the his curiosity got the better again, so she opened the door softly and entered.

The first sensation she had upon entering was relief, followed by a pleasant surprise: the room was kept in a much better way than expected, the bed was tidy and clean, the carpet was spread without too many folds, the bookcase was nice...the only thing that really was messed up was the mass of crumpled sheets above and below the desk, sign of a probably very frustrating job. Neo didn't focus too much on the room itself, but pointed straight to the bookstore hoping there was a diary or photo album; but after several minutes of inspection she found nothing that could satisfy her, so she directed her attentions to the desk, where a still whole sheet caught his attention: it was a drawing of a house of wood and stone as there are so many outside the realms, surrounded by a fence. The sense of familiarity that Neo had now recognized as a wake-up call returned to be heard suddenly, but not so much for the house itself as for the fence; it was designed with stunning attention compared to the generality of the house, and the girl could have sworn to remember a fence that was the same in every damn way as the one drawn, with crooked stakes and the feather-decorated gate, but couldn't have defined well where or when she had already seen it.

Seized by the frustration, Neo took a crumpled sheet and opened it. What she saw made her give up the paper instinctively: it was the drawing of a human hand reproduced in a very faithful way but presenting colossal scars on the fingers, as if someone had taken skin off of them by force. Taken by a horrible suspicion, she started to open all the other sheets and none of them was much better; some presented surreal drawings on the edge of hallucinogen, others were repetitions of the hand, others were distorted portraits of Gin with a name written at the bottom to mimic a signature: Fernet. As she opened papers in a frenetic way the girl discovered that, buried under the crumpled sheets, there was a very worn book whose back was illegible; opening it and trying to read it she discovered that several pages were marked and scribbled with a pen, but she understood that it was a simplified psychology manual, one of those given to schools. She continued leafing through it until she reached a chapter where the scribbles made the text below almost unreadable; trying to understand something she noticed that only some words were legible, circled in a voluminous way: "Person" "Mind" "Two or more" "Identity". Ever more alarmed, the girl checked what the chapter corresponded to in the index and saw that even there the words were scrawled; however, with a little concentration, she was able to read the title of the chapter. And as soon as she did, her face went blank as chalk

_"Dissociative Identity Disorder"._


	5. Interlude: Dialogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, IdeaHunter speaking. Well, first of all I wanted to wish you a Marry Christmas and a Happy new Yea-no, make it a Decade, for everyone. This is kind of a present from me, even thought it's not long or full of events like the others...but I kind of like how it turned out, so i Thought of posting it anyway. 
> 
> Well, have a good read!

"Be...quiet"

_"You can't hide it forever, Gin. You know it, DON'T YOU?!"_

"I said...shut up"

_"She saw the weapon. Most likely she would've saw the symbol too and started to have some questions . And when she will ask them...WHAT WILL YOU ANSWER? "_

"I'll think about it when it happens...if it happens"

_"You haven't changed a thing, Gin. Too scared to tell her how things are, huh? You haven't grew at all from THAT NIGHT"_

"E...enough"

_"If we're lucky, she'll just run away. If we are unlucky, and we know that we are the bad luck in person, she will panic and try to KILL US "_

"She...won't"

"_AND WHAT GUARANTEES YOU?!"_

"... she...has something strange. Her eyes...and her hair. Since the day she is here...i'm having visions again"

_"All the more reason to get rid of her! Those visions are fragments of something to bury. WE.DON'T.NEED.THEM."_

"But we do...those visions...show our life before that night. A happier life. We...need to know what happened "

_"She doesn't care about all this. Neither of your visions, nor of that night, NOR OF_ US!_ "_

"I don't believe it. We are too similar not to care...she will be curious too »

_"Stop playing the detective and face reality. SHE.DOESN'T.GIVE.A.FUCK! All she cares about is to get out of here and carry on her goddamn life. And we, to her, are a monster"_

"It's...not true"

_"You know better than me that it's true. AND YOU ALSO KNOW WHAT TO DO"_

"Stop that"

_"Kill her" _

"That's enough"

_"Take the scissors and CUT HER HEAD OFF"_

«I said...stop it!!!!»

The tears on the boy's cheeks betrayed the conflict. His scream betrayed fear. His gaze betrayed the sickness of his soul


	6. The face of the unknown

Neo left the room as fast as she could, slamming the door behind her and then leaning against it devoided of all energies. It took her a few minutes to process what she just discovered and to relate everything to the situation she was in; both of her eyes were pearly, as it always happens when she's frightened or taken by surprise, and her breathing was rapid and irregular. She got up shaky and headed towards the dining room without a real reason, only to get away from that room and what it contained: sitting at the table, she reflected on the consequences of her discovery in a silence different from her usual one, a silence that revealed many terrible doubts.

Gin returned to the house after a few minutes. He stopped for a while in the living room, probably to put away his weapon, then went to the kitchen and stopped in the doorway: «Neo? Are you OK?" The girl looked at him like a newly captured beast looks at the keeper of his cage; it was a look full of suspicion, which sought to see the soul of the boy in front of her, to discover its secrets. He noticed it, because he barely stepped back: «Why...do you have that face? It...looks like you're angry with me.» She shook her head. No, she wasn't angry. She was scared. Frightened by what could happen inside the boy's mind, of his instability...in short, she was afraid because she couldn't foresee it. For a whole week Gin's behavior had been very normal, perhaps a little shy, but not dangerous; now Neo had the feeling that this was nothing but a mask...no, a cap. A lid to keep people from seeing what was in the cauldron, what was boiling inside his mind. The girl got up grabbing the scroll and went to Gin, who continued to back away with a worried expression: «Neo, you're starting to scare me...» She stopped less than a meter away from him, showing him what she had written on the screen: «**The one who's scared here is me**». Gin shifted her gaze from the text to the girl, shaking her head slowly: «What are you saying Neo? What...what are you afraid of?» The old sentence disappeared from the semitransparent scroll screen and in its place only one word appeared: «**You**»

For a long second there was silence. The whole world crumbled under the boy and reassembled itself in a split second as the blood disappeared from his face and the heart stopped for a moment, started beating madly immediately. His breathing became irregular: «What...what are you saying...Neo, what...» Other words appeared on the scroll: «**Gin, I've been in your room. I've seen your drawings. And the medical textbook.**» Gin's head started to spin. This was not supposed to happen. At all. Why had this happened?

_Because you trusted her _

The boy angrily silenced the voice in his mind before returning to focus on Neo: «P-Please Neo, let me explain...» The girl composed the words with her fingers that began to tremble: «**You kept it hidden from me**»

«Can you blame me? "Yes, however I have a mental illness...and it's like there are two people inside my body". What impression...would I've made?!» Panic was starting to raise Gin's voice

«**How do I know you weren't going to kill me? Or worse, to rape me?**»

«Neo...I have two personalities. That doesn't mean I'm a psychopath»

«**Maybe not you. But what about Fernet?**»

No. Nonononon_ONONONONONO-_

Gin held his head between his hands trying to calm the angry roars that were making his skull explode, not caring about the terrified look that Neo was giving him. Panting and snarling, he tried to silence that demonic voice that ranted threats and insults, praying to Gin to let him out, to let him teach that dirty _WOMAN NOT TO MEDDLE IN OTHER PEOPLE'S BUSINESS-_

*SLAM*

If she was scared before, Neo was now terrified. After reading her answer on the scroll, the boy started to shake holding his head like he had an unbearable headache and then violently slammed it against the wall; after this he froze. He stood with his head against the wall and his breath as if he had run for a long distance. He slowly turned his head, looking at her with the brown eye: «Don't ...you...ever...mention...that...name...again». Neo kept her hands in front of her mouth, shaking like a leaf: she passed her whole life side by side to one of Remnant's most dangerous criminals, being his most deadly assassin and right and man, risking her life more or less every week...but there, for the first time, she felt fear freeze her legs and paralyze her heart. Her gaze darted from one part of the room to the other in search of any object that could serve as a weapon but even if there was one, she probably wouldn't have been able to take it. Gin turned completely towards her with an empty and cold expression, articulating the words with an exasperating slowness: «Neo...sit down...and let me ... explain» The girl sat at the trembling table, while the other took her scroll and casually placed it in front of her; while all this was going on he didn't stop taking deep breaths in an attempt to regain control of himself.

They sat in front of each other for a few minutes. The silence was so perfect that it was almost deafening, and the boy's expression was always the same: empty and cold. Neo grabbed the scroll in front of her with the hand numb with tension and Gin had regained control of his breathing and was now looking for the right words to explain the situation. Finally, he broke the silence with a hoarse voice: «I didn't think...you would have entered my room» She just listened with goosebumps «But it's okay...it's my fault...I never said not to enter, after all» Was he excusing her? Justifying her? Did he really thought that? Or was there a second end to his understanding words? Neo couldn't take away the impression that he was making an immense effort to get the words out. He continued: «...you saw...the drawings, didn't you?» She nodded with a dry mouth, feeling like a rust slowing down her movements «He...made those. I...was sleeping» What the hell did that meant? Neo couldn't take it anymore and started typing quickly on the scroll: «**I don't understand what you mean. I'm confused. I'm scared**.» The boy breathed a disconsolate sigh and joined his hands. «I suffer from ... dissociative identity disorder. Do you know how that works?» She shook her head, so he continued: «Let's say that...it's like a ship had two pilots...but only one rudder. The two pilots take turns taking control of the ship...without one knowing which way the other has gone» Neo frowned, beginning to understand: «**You don't know what he does?**» «I don't remember it. I have an idea of what he does...just because I have to deal with the consequences» Deal with the consequences...Neo looked down, lost into her thoughts. The weather outside the house was starting to worse, throwing the ruins into the shadows. Suddenly she raised her head and typed a few words on the screen: «**But you can hear him, right?**»

Silence.

«**At least you can hear what he thinks**»

Silence

«**Is that why you hit your head earlier?**»

Gin had stood motionless under those questions, as if he had been impaled. He managed to nod slowly after a few seconds, with the same air of tension that had gripped him a few minutes earlier. Neo must have understood that she just touched a bare nerve, because he carefully chose the words to write: «**If you don't want to talk about it, it's fine**.» Once finished reading, Gin moved her gaze to her face: to Neo it seemed to be looked at by another self, the specter of another life wanting even more ruthless and bloody than she had lived. Gin's voice brought her down to earth: «Neo...» the look had become more penetrating, as if he wanted to study her soul: «Now I'll ask you a question...and I want you to answer me sincerely» his voice was cold and hoarse, he seemed to want to stretch the string of a violin using only his words. Neo felt something take her in the chest, like the feeling that something terrible was about to happen...but she nodded anyway. Gin leaned over the table, bringing his face close to her: «Why...did you entered my room?» The question came cold and hard, the type of question that expects a clear and concise answer; the kind of answer Neo wouldn't have been able to give. Her hands lingered on the scroll, unsure of which letters to press in what order. Her mind was crowded with thoughts, doubts, fears, which she was unable to sort. So she decided not to seek the answer between her thoughts but among her feelings: she closed her eyes and let her fingers wander on the keyboard on their own, more sure than their own owner. When she opened her eyes again the answer surprised her too: «Because I want to know who you are. I want to give your name a story, and i want to link that story to my own» Gin observed the words, shifting his gaze several times from the text to Neo and vice versa; then he asked another question: «Do you want ... still to know?» Neo looked down again, reflecting on the question. She turned her gaze inside her and saw her own unknown calling for her, the fog that hid what was before Roman, the adoption, the crime...the girl before Neopolitan. And she saw the key to herself before her, just waiting to be picked up. Her gaze, now filled with serene determination, met Gin's.

And she nodded;


End file.
